Ahhhhhhh

As you've already read, I have this week off. It's winter break. I am so excited to get the classroom in order, and get myself in order. I am so grateful to have this time to plan ahead and look forward to starting fresh with the kids. I told them not to be surprised when they came back and the room was rearranged. I need to make it more conducive to learning, more inviting. Right now it has a really sterile feel, like a college classroom. Not the kind of place that anyone wants to spend 7 or 8 hours everyday.

I feel a lot better this week, now that I have time to put it in perspective. I know everything is going to work out. I know that everything will be fine in the end. I have to keep pushing through. I need to think about the kids and their futures. As Rafe Esquith said yesterday at his book signing, "You have to think about giving these kids the skills they will need in five years, or ten years." That is my goal for the remaining months I'm with these kids. I owe them this.

I want to give a huge thank you to all of you that have given me words of wisdom and encouragement as I have ventured out on this new road. Whether it's been in the comments on this blog, emails, or phone calls, I appreciate you reaching out. This has been a big challenge for me, but knowing there are people out there who are thinking about me makes it that much easier. Two people in particular have been extra special in the kindness department:

Stein. He's the one who has to deal with my tears, fears, and psycho babble at the end of a long day. He gently gives me advice or feedback. He's the one who wakes me up on the couch in the morning after a night of insomnia. He's the one who makes dinner for me when all I can do at night sometimes is stare at the TV. He does this all without me asking. He knows me. He supports me. He's wonderful.

Mickey. Almost everyday I get an email from her checking in on me. When I get a spare moment during the day, it's so comforting to see her email in my inbox. She gets the whole teaching thing. She also gets being in a new position for the first time and all the challenges involved. She lets me babble to her on the phone. She listens. Intently. She offers advice when necessary or appropriate. And like a big sister and a best friend, she wants me to succeed, no matter what.

This week as I have more time, I am thinking about all of you. And I am thankful you are in my life.